WINS ABOVE REPLACEMENT!

WINS ABOVE REPLACEMENT is the most ridiculous thing that SABR Metrics geeks have cooked up thus far! It makes me want to reach for an air sick bag!

Ultimate Zone Rating Contest!

Here is our first contest of the year! Can you guess who won the Ultimate Zone Rating in MLB in 2012? The first correct answer will receive a copy of Bill James' Baseball Abstract that I used to line my bird's cage! HAR HAR HAR!!!!!!!!!!! SABR Metrics suck, stop the madness!

SABR WANTS YOUR SOUL! STOP IT NOW!

SABR wants your mind and soul! SABR is a mind control system that is designed to turn us into a nation of hairy bearded fools like BILL JAMES! (Yes the same Bill James who said Kal Daniels was a future hall of famer! STOP SABR they are a threat to your spiritual and emotional freedom!

OPS+???????????????

These SABR Metrics dorks just don't know when to shut up. Now we have OPS+, can WAR+ or WHIP+++ be far behind? This stuff is complete mind-rot! 

BRIAN KENNEY SABR METRICS DORK OF THE YEAR 2013!

While it's only January, MLB Network's Brian Kenny has been elected as our SABR Metrics Dork Of The Year 2013! Kenny is absolutely unbearable on the show Clubhouse Confidential, kissing the ass of hairy old bore Bill James and his stupid SABR metrics rubbish. Aren't you all sick of the WAR WARP OPS OPS+ WHIP fucking nonsense? The stuff doesn't mean shit! Kenny is absolutely repellent, I just can't listen to him anymore! I think he wants to have Mike Trout's baby! Hey Kenny stick that Ultimate Zone Rating horseshit up your ass, sideways! JACK MORRIS-HALL OF FAMER!